I set my alarm for 8 AM this morning after getting to bed at 4. I slept about 3 and a half hours and woke myself to see if Dad was headed to Peoria to cover for Angela. She has had a retirement seminar scheduled with the state for 6 months. As of yesterday, it was still in flux because of some paperwork issues that I did not listen hard enough to understand… It’s something with the State of Illinois and retirement planning after 50. It’s been elusive to get handled so she was going to make this appointment, even with all we have going on.
Dad said, “What are you doing up?” I just told him I was checking to make sure everything was in order. Turns out, it was canceled again… She was not approved to attend or the fact I took her keys for the car at the hospice might have been a handicap. Though, I do believe if I were to blame, I would have heard more about it.
He was already headed to Peoria anyway. Dad was nice enough to come over early and cover for Angela while he knew I might be sleeping in. Good enough for me… I slept till 9:30 and headed up to Peoria. I met Angela at the door as she came in… Then caught Nate. He was just getting up.
Nate’s Mom, Silver, was minutes away from the house and was picking him up to run back to Decatur. Nate, since we went to Memphis 2 weeks ago has been without his car. The plan is to get him back to Carbondale Friday and he will be back here Saturday.
Our day was filled with family and friends as it has since we got back from Memphis. We were a little rowdier today as Summer has been resting and responding as she sees fit. I’m sure folks on our wing of the Richard Owens hospice wonder why they can hear people laughing from a room in this building. I could hear my Dad down the hall.
No matter the circumstance. There is joy in being in a room with the ones you love.
Lots of stories were being told and I figure at this point laughs should fill Summer’s ears and smiles should fill her eyes instead of silence and darkness.
I have been content to let others spend their time in her face talking and soothing her. Summer spent her last year with Mom and Dad and I figure she would rather see anyone else in her alert moments. I am not saying I am abandoning her! Just saying, I love spending our quiet mornings together knowing that the afternoon will be filled with visitors from all realms of her life.
Tonight, it was about 9 PM, when the nurses came in to start moving Summer’s position in her bed, I decided it was a great time to make an exit. It was getting dark!? I swear we lose track of daylight hours when inside the room all day.
The nurse said she would stop what she was doing so I could say goodbye.
Summer was laying on her right side, and I got down to give her a kiss and say “Good Night”. After I pulled back, her eyes looked into mine and she smiled. A real smile. I swear to you that it took everything within my power to hold back the gallons of tears that were ready to pour out of my head. My voice cracked as I exclaimed to the occupants of the room (Angela, Aiden and an unnamed nurse) that she smiled.
Aiden and I walked out together but took separate cars home. I managed to hold it together while driving… But it was sloppy. I am hoping by writing this that I will stitch this memory into my head so that I never forget the moment.
I did not take any pictures today. I was happy we had a room full of people for the better part of the day. Sometimes the pictures portray loneliness and today was anything but lonely.
I have been fixated on the song Wonderful Glorious by Eels since the concert last night. Don’t be shocked if I use that song on some “Stories” tonight.
You are blessed.
This is a wonderful and meaningful reflection regarding time spent with Summer. She is blessed to have such great family and friends around her! May the good Lord grant His grace, mercy, and peace to each one supporting dear Summer.
Thank you, Pastor Lee. We know she loves Jesus.
Hold those precious moments close!
The Lord is with you. He wraps his arms around you. He is bringing you peace in your time of need.