I realize it’s been a few days since my last post. This is probably not a shocker… Aiden has been home for a week, and our 100 gigs of internet were used up by the time Summer got home on Friday. We effectively had no internet at the house if I wanted to blog or not! Once Summer and Nate got home last Friday… It’s been wake-to-sleep busy with these guys. Busy days and late nights. Nate, if you don’t know, will play games until the wee hours of the night if given the slightest sign of interest! 
It was an awesome weekend. It was the weekend I had hoped we would have at Christmas. But, maybe it was better to have our 4 days without all the craziness of the holidays. Regardless, we were all sad to see it end.
This morning, I went to work and freaked everyone out for a few hours since they all thought I would have already skipped town. Summer and I are in Memphis this week, but she didn’t want to leave till the last second… That meant we wouldn’t leave till after lunch as a family with Grandma Linda. (Aiden is still in town for a day longer for winter break) A few minutes after we had eaten, we were on the road to Memphis. The drive is 6.5 hours and it is starting to feel like maps or clocks are unnecessary… It’s still a tough slog in one sitting. We stopped once for 5 gallons of gas (Fort’s Prius Prime is awesome!) and a bathroom break at Love’s south of St. Louis. 10 minutes max was our break time. Summer is a great road warrior!
I am not looking forward to this week. It’s back to the in-patient grind.
Tomorrow, we start with labs. Later, Doc will consult with us after they take a look at the readings. Summer looks and seems to be in good spirits and energy. That’s good and bad. Her good condition will make her “ready to go” for her next round of chemo (that’s also the bad part, I would love a few days’ reprieve). Again, we will check into St. Jude and I will park myself in the little suite next to her hospital room as they hit her with the big doses. This could start tomorrow night… But we think it will be Wednesday afternoon.
I got to the apartment tonight and found nothing but candy and drinks in the fridge! Ugh! I will not go to the grocery store or make any food requests from the courtesy service because I don’t really plan on seeing this room much this week. I will probably be eating breakfast, lunch, and dinner in the hospital. God help Angela next week when she gets her turn. I think Nate must not have eaten anything here when he was supervising last week.
I got a few comments about Summer’s “joke” in the last post. You think it’s rough on your end reading it… Try being in the room when the macabre conversations come up.
I have taken it upon myself to keep the blog filled with as much sunshine and rainbows as I can. It is VERY easy to get dark when talking about Cancer and the things we see every day. Summer is surrounded by love, your prayers and juju, kismet, and good thoughts in ways that I never imagined. It warms my heart to know so many people who don’t even know her are praying and thinking about her.
But, when you are here. There is always an elephant in the room. And that subject does pop up.
Summer and I had strong words months ago about going back to college. “I don’t want to waste my time going back if I only have a few years to live” was the argument she was throwing at me one day when we talked about keeping registered at SIUC. I told her that she was going back if she had 6 months to live. She is getting her degree! Plus, she loves the Nates and Geno. She does not, contrary to Mom and Dad’s wishes and desires, love sitting home in Tremont by herself.
At Thanksgiving, we had a go-around about what-ifs. “I could be dead in 3 months!” she sneered at me. I snapped back that she was full of malarky, she won’t die that fast, it will take a lot longer! Her child-like arguments she wants to use as an excuse for pity do not work on me. Aiden was standing there watching the whole thing and I am pretty sure he was at a rare loss for words.
These are rare situations. We keep so busy and move so many people around that it’s hard to get mired down in a situation of woe-is-me.
We put our best foot forward every day and make all of our days count. Whether home or in Memphis… We push ahead.
Tonight, on the way down we were talking about college and she is ready to get an apartment, and get her last semester completed. The timing might all work out with the Nates and I am pretty sure Geno has no place to be.
It can get dark and scary, but there is light ahead… There is optimism. (And a cat, and lots of sarcasm)
Summer, Grandma is praying for you, always. Love you!!!
Summer: Your cat Geno reminds me of our cat Sam. Similar coloring. He was such a sweetie. He loved people, especially women. He would stand by the door when someone came to see who it was. Our two cats now, are just scaredy cats. Running to hide when there is a knock on the door. I will be thinking of you especially this week when things might be harder for you. I love your Grand Julie. She was my boss at Ben Franklin years ago. I miss her. She always told me about you and Aiden when you were little tikes growing up. I think you can also love people you might not know personally. Her love for you is enough for me to love you also. You are in my thoughts most days now and all the prayer warriors are on the job. Love Dianne
I haven’t lived with cancer so I’m not going to give words of wisdom but tell Summer this: life is short for all of us. Some have it shorter than others, but Life is worth Living, no matter the time frame. Your daughter is one smart cookie. She deserves to get her degree. Tell her to do it! And go for it! I’ve lived my entire life with a disease and I do get it. Somedays it’s like, “Ugh….is this all worth it?!” And I get a momentary self-pity moment. But then my kids and hubby kick my booty and it’s Game On!! LOL