Hats

It’s cold outside.  It’s been that way all week, but today is the kind of cold that takes over the news, even when the world is on fire.  

This cold is the inspiration to wear a knit hat.  -30 with wind chill makes you reevaluate your gear. When you are lacking coverage on the top of your head, as I do, you have to be extra aware of a chance for freezing forehead.  No more mesh ball cap, fashion gloves, and a light jacket that get you from your attached garage to the doorstep of work.  Nope…  The heavy gear is coming out.

We have a room next to the garage, which is not named because it has always been a weird space in our house.  It’s a buffer room between our master bedroom, the hallway, and the garage.  Angela will call it the “extra room” sometimes, and I, still not understanding what she is talking about, will look at her like a confused dog. 

In the extra room, we keep all the coats, gloves, holiday wrapping paper, and cat litter.  It’s a catch-all. 

It should not shock anyone who has had kids or is knee deep in middle age that we have drawers, deep drawers, dedicated to gloves, hats, and scarves.  How many hats can we wear at one time?  One, but we are stocked up in case you to want to have matching colors and designs, depending on our desire to look chic.  Frumpy is there if you like as well.  

All of this to tell you that I was looking for a hat a few days ago.  Now, you know where I have to go, and you know the selection I have to choose from.  Even with an inventory as big as any of the new fashion stores on the East side of Pekin, I could not find what I was looking for.  I have several knit hats, probably 10 from years of working at Fort’s, and a couple of them have a “Fort’s Trail Team” logo.  This theme was my goal for my drive to work this past Monday.  

The extra room is dark, as it only has a half window to the garage.  In the dim light, I opened the drawer and began to root around, looking for the perfect gray knit work cap.  I knew within a couple of yanks of the other hats that Angela was going to rage later if she saw how much I had stirred up the order of this drawer by deconstructing its contents.  

I turned on a light and organized my search.  How in the world can I not find a Trail Team hat in this drawer?  Miles Neilson Hat?  Yep.  Roger Clyne?  Found it.  Deemack Chiefs.  A couple of those.  I CANT FIND MY TRAIL TEAM HAT!

My frustration subsided when I saw a blue hat lying flat at the bottom of the drawer.  It’s blue, not cerulean or navy.  It’s the websters dictionary definition of blue.  I know this hat.  This was Summer’s, and I was kind of shocked to see it lying so casually at the bottom of this drawer.  

2017…  Summer and I were both having mixed reactions to the new album by the National.  “Sleep Well Beast”.  The album feels like an exposed nerve and builds a lot of tension.  It’s not the suave and demur National that we know well from their previous albums.  This album is a slow burn, but we eventually came to hold it in high esteem.  No matter what we thought of this album, I was getting tickets to see them live, and I knew my 16-year-old kid was game for the show. 

Like so many, it was a hit-and-run concert; that’s how cheapskates like me do shows in downtown Chicago.  We drove two and a half hours that afternoon, took some wrong turns, ended up on Lower Wacker, and eventually found a parking garage near the Civic Opera House.  Still following typical concert protocol, we headed directly to the merch booth.  I remember looking at all the t-shirts and trinkets, thinking “This is lame”.  The album art for “Sleep Well Beast” was the outline of the shape of the building where they recorded.  It’s literally a square and a triangle on top.  Very plain.  I am not sure I bought anything.  I’m a fan, but practical, and didnt want to buy something just to buy.  They did have their whole LP collection for a bajillion dollars.  No thanks.  But for Summer, I had the credit card ready, and I was happy to buy the knit hat and some pins. 

I was mildly surprised that she wanted this blue hat.  But, she had to get something?!?!?  Right? 

Summer rocked that hat for many years.  I would be shocked if anyone ever knew where that hat came from.  She was the queen of Goodwill, and most people probably assumed it was a secondhand freebie.  

I have a favorite memory of her in that hat, and I will share it, either on Insta or YouTube.  It was while we were at COSTCO, and she had a hot piece of pizza burning her mouth.  She’s in pain, but as usual, we are getting her to laugh it off.  Story of her life.  

I am looking at this hat in the drawer… And every memory I just wrote has just flashed through my mind.  

I should take this hat to wear today.  Then a new thought came to mind.  I can’t wear this hat.  My noggin will stretch it out and make it useless. 

Useless for whom?  Who am I saving this hat for?  Nobody knows the significance of a plain blue hat with a tag that says NTL on it.  I grabbed the hat and put it in the pocket of my winter coat.  It has been there all week.  Fortunately, I have not been stranded on the side of the road or found myself outside for any extended duration needing to cover my balding head.  

This morning, after finally working up to it… I put the hat on before we left the house for Angela’s weekend Casey’s fountain soda addiction.  The minute I pull it over my head…  I notice a smell.  Shampoo?  It’s subtle.  It smells like someone else’s hat.  I do not remember Summer as a “smell”…  This must be her.  This was a hard minute.   

I can feel the condescension of Summer, and she is yelling at me.  “Stop! You’re stretching it”.  She wants to pull it off my head.  The exchange ends with us laughing…  As we almost always did.